Unfiltered

I have come to realize that my blog has been more of a venting place for me as of late, and tonight your getting me unfiltered.

I try to always keep my composure in any given situation.  I think we all do, or at least I hope we do. I constantly struggle with being the "bigger" person.  After all, that's the way my momma raised me.  But my daddy taught me to stand up for myself and what I believe in.  So some days I'm completely composed and other days it's no holds barred. 

Today is the latter.

I've lost my composure for the night.

I'm tired of dealing with mean mommies.  I'm tired of constantly being the topic of their conversation.  Of course, they say I'm the last thing on their minds, but people talk and they should watch who they talk to, because eventually it all gets back around.  And when your name is mentioned over and over, then yes, that makes me the topic of your conversation.  I'd like to say it doesn't bother me, but hello, I'm human.  It hurts.  Which is what they intend anyway when they say hateful things.

But more than the mean mommies, it hurts more to deal with an ex-spouse who's hateful.  Because that, my friends doesn't hurt just me, it hurts my kid.  Now I'm not gonna sit up on my high horse and act like I haven't said things in front of my daughter, which is wrong, but my actions speak far louder than my words ever do.

Facebook is a wonderful thing at times, and then others use it as their podium to bash and trash people.  Good grief, pick up the phone and bash me but don't be the jerk and put it on FB.  How little of you.  If you know me on FB, then you know I will not bash people on there. I occasionally get a little huffy, but not in hurtful or lying ways.  I'm more of a in your face type of girl if something really bothers me.

It's a tough road dealing with divorce and new spouses, new step-parents, new lives.  But those of us who attempt to treat things with care reap far greater benefits for our kids.  We've been down a long road.  And for the most part, things are decent.  But then there are the days that I want to slap people.  Is is too much to ask that my daughter gets to school on time?  That she makes it to her soccer games with time to warm up, not 10 minutes before kick-off?  Is it too much to ask that she goes to a birthday party she was invited to?  Or that something is bought solely for her at the school carnival and not for yourself? Or that she's allowed to go to the church she chose to join?

I really thought things would be different.  And let me be honest, I've had my hateful moments.  But I've never not put her first.  I've never kept her from her dad, heck I even give him 1 night every week I don't have to and on his weekend he gets another night I don't have to allow.  But I do it for Caroline.  Because even though I'd love to keep her all to myself, she needs time with him too.

I'm bitter.  I'm bitter because I know how much her dad loves her, but he doesn't put her first.

I'm the mom that truly lives for my child.  Mine and the hubby's life revolve around her and her schedule.  She always comes first.  I wouldn't have married him if he expected it to be any different.  I know not every parent feels the same way we do, and that's okay.  But it makes it hard for me to watch her other set of parents choose differently.  We choose not to make plans to go out without her, we make plans on the weekends we don't have her.  I guess what bothers me the most about the weekends is that she only gets to be with her friends on my weekends.  It's not okay for him to give up his time for her to go to a birthday party, spend the night with a friend, go to church with us...but I have to, but that's okay because I have her all week?  Right.  Because after homework, soccer practice, I get a whole hour with her before bath time and an 8:30 bedtime.

We're parents.  We do for our kids.  We take them places and let them make friends despite our time with them.  That's what we do.  We put their needs first.  Period.  At least that's the way it works for me.

I'm just tired of the constant competition, who has what, who's trying to be like someone else.  Well, I can tell you, you can try, but you'll never be me.  I'm one of a kind.  Find your own way in this life.  I have.  And that is directed at many people.

I'm an over the top mom because I have one kid and I can be.  I'm over the top because my kid loves it, she is so proud of the things I can make and the things I do for her.  It's not a competition between other moms.  It's something that makes my little girl giggle and dance.  I do it for her and her only.  I do it to see the way she lights up when I pull off the impossible poodle skirt that has to be made in less than 10 hours (with time to sleep) and ready for school the next morning.  I do it because I may not have her on a certain holiday and I wanted her desk at school to be decorated just for her, so that she knows I didn't miss a single one of her favorite things.

I do it because she is my whole world.  I parent her the way I do because she is my everything.  I volunteer on the PTA so that I can give her the best years of elementary school possible.  I do it because I want her to have everything her heart desires, within reason of course.  I do it because I want her to make friends.  I do it because I want her to have every opportunity possible.  I do it from my heart and I do it with pure love.

So if you choose to bash me, talk about me, copy me, then I'll choose to take it as a compliment.  Because at the end of the day, I know its just other people's insecurities that cause them to act the way they do.  I don't need to be like anyone else, because my daughter, my husband, they love me for who I already am.




*****Bring on the backlash, I know it's coming*****

Letting Go...Finally

The beauty of owning my own domain name / blog is that I can post anything I want.  Granted any blog can truly do that, but I actually own mine.  And I'll be honest, it's no big deal.  But, I feel like when people post on FB or twitter or whatever form of social media that they choose, that they somehow are making people see the crap they post.  Whereas on my blog, you totally choose to visit here.  You're not forced to see what I post when you log in.  Although you could just delete someone on FB or twitter, but then what fun would it be if you couldn't gossip and create havoc in someone's life?  I digress...

I'm not usually a negative person, I leave that to the hubby.  I'm, 9 times out of 10, pretty upbeat and positive.  But I'm tired of logging in to FB or twitter and seeing people be so dang negative.  Try counting your blessings for a change.

In the spring of 2011 I was nominated and voted in as PTA President.  I was very happy to follow in my momma's footsteps.  Little did I know it would bring out all the "haters".  WOW.

I guess I kinda thought that since I was in my 30's and all, that people were beyond the high school cliquish ways.  Wrong.  Before I knew it, I was in the middle of a "friend" war.  Good grief.  Just what I wanted to waste my time on.  Never did I dream that people my age were still acting like this.  Yet, they are.  So this started, and I quickly washed my hands of it.  I'm not getting into the game.  So I went about my year, treated no one any differently despite things that had been said about me & my family.  They think they're invincible and that these "friends" aren't running back to me to tell me what they say...not that I want to waste my time on hearing it.  I guess the funniest part of the whole thing to me is that I put a piece of false info out to 1 person.  Promise, only one. And within 2 hours I heard it from 3 people.  I never confronted the person.  It truly wasn't worth my energy.

The year went on just fine after that.  Piece of cake actually.  I held my cards close and never let those fake people anywhere near my real life.  Although they sure thought they were.

The last 2 months of school rolls around and all hades breaks loose.  Oh, the hilarity of it all.  I was verbally threatened.  I was bullied.  And they really thought I was gonna admit to things, which oddly enough, never happened.  I guess what makes it completely comical to me, is that I never said a word about any of these people.  You see, I was childish enough once to play that game, and I lost.  And I will never, ever do it again.  I hurt my friend, her family, and we've never been friends since.  I know the price.

But I guess what irks me the most is how completely brazen some people are.  Self-consumed.  Arrogant.  Pitiful people.  Who seek to destroy others.  And I'm tired of being the target.  My business was copied, my gear was copied, my locations were copied.  And, I guess that's the most sincere form of flattery, to have what you've worked so hard for over the past 2+ years copied.  But I'm over it.  I'm washing my hands of it here and now.  I've given an olive branch, trying to forgive, but its been broken in my face.

Being so self-centered is not my style.  And I have to admit, whoever watches my FB and "reports" to others what I post, it's a little pathetic.  I made a post yesterday.  Which was quickly spread to people the post had nothing to do with.  Obviously they are so self-consumed they thought it was, and everything I do apparently, revolving around them.  Here is what I posted...obviously their guilt got the better of them...

...I'm tired of hearing people whining about how soon school's gonna start, how many school supplies they have to buy etc...be THANKFUL you have those kids to drive you crazy all summer and that you GET to help provide supplies for all the kids!!! $10 extra bucks for stuff your kid won't need but another family can't afford will NOT kill you! Too many people take for granted that God gave them this blessing! Suck it up people! I know too many parents who are watching their kids fight for their lives. Geesh!...

Now what amazes me most about the whole thing is that this post was not directed at, involving, or pertaining to said selfish person.  It was however, directed at 3 of my friends back home who over the past 3 days have gripped on FB about these very things.  And I have commented on those posts stating how I disagreed.  And why was I so sick of seeing and hearing about it?  Because I happen to know of a few families whose children are fighting, literally, fighting for their lives.  And I'm tired of people taking what their given for granted.  Each child is a blessing.  I was blessed with one, tried many, many times and years for another.  If you can't find something better to do than gripe about those blessings, then please, get away from me.  

So I guess you could say a "response" to my post was posted on this person's page.  Who, I blocked and can't see, who no one I actually talk to would dare discuss because they can't stand her, who I do not ever want to be associated with...so why, please tell me, would I ever want to openly talk about her?  Duh people.  I don't.  But, I feel like I need to purge all my bad feelings and so that's what I'm doing tonight.  I'm letting go.  I'm saying what needs to be said so that I can rid myself of all the negativity.  I will allow her this post.  Here you go.  I'm ridding my life of your toxicity.  Enjoy the glory of me talking about you.  And don't mistake anything I say ever again to be about you.  Frankly, your just not worth the energy.  I have a precious little girl whom I would do anything for, cherish each day I get, a husband whom I love madly and who loves and cherishes me.  I truly hope you can find your happiness in life, but I'm done letting you try to put your negativity off on me.  Take ownership of your actions people.

I'm truly sad for people like this who just can't seem to find better things to do than compare their lives to others and cast judgement.  Be thankful...you never know when He might choose to take it all away.

Thank you to the many people I can truly call my friends.  You are priceless to me and my family!

p.s.  I can see every IP address that visits.  So all of you that thrive on stirring the pot, I can track you all the way down to google maps showing me where you've logged in from down to house and street.  enjoy the blog :)

My Views, My Life, My Family

I am finally emerging again, and probably only because I am home sick again today. I have apparently caught a bug, and can't venture too far, so it has given me plenty of time for reflection and thought.

Hopefully after this post, I will be back to my normal self and can resume posting quirky things about Caroline and silly pictures, but for today, I am going to say a few things on a more serious level.

Thank you to all of you who have been thinking of us and praying for us. What a comfort!

I'm sure that with as cryptic as my last post was, many of you are a little curious, and that's okay, we're human, and we like to know what's going on...otherwise, why would we read blogs? As of late yesterday afternoon, things for us changed for the better! Finally!

I have never been one of those overprotective moms...I don't run to Boog when she falls down, I don't baby her, and I talk pretty straight to her; I didn't do baby talk. But, I have been very picky about the things she sees, plays with, who's care she's in. There are certain people I don't let her ride in a car with, definitly no Bratz toys, and I don't let her just go to play with anyone that asks. There are certain people that I trust implicitly when it comes to Caroline. Now even that has changed.

I always thought I was a great judge of character, maybe I'm not. I've learned my lesson, and I guess now I will be overbearing about certain things pertaining to my sweet little girl.

Caroline has always been a pretty good kid. Her biggest problem is talking...non-stop. I know, I know, she gets it from me. But, she has never been a mean little girl, she shares really well {especially for being an only child}, she is very thoughtful, so I am a little easy on her when it comes to discipline. She does get time out, a pop on the bootie, and toys taken away...I just let her push and I don't stick to the guidelines I give her. It's hard to be tough on your kids sometimes. Bottom line, she is very honest, blunt, knows right from wrong, and knows when and why she is in trouble.

Some of the things that have gone on over the past week have implicated her in a totally different light, as well as another child who is extremely well behaved, and comes from a super family with lots of love, and a strong Christian foundation. Not that this means this child is perfect, because clearly, we know no one is. But given the raising of this child, I feel strongly about the behavior that was called into question.

A case was opened concerning Caroline and another child, and what is so amusing to me about it was that the family that opened the case only knows Caroline, not the other child/family. And what makes the whole thing even more bizarre is that so many of the things we were told by the family who did this make no sense, and point more to an issue with their child. The stories are conflicting from what Caroline tells me, so what am I supposed to do? Believe another family who is telling me stuff 2nd and 3rd hand, or my own child? What makes it more frustrating is that is the same point the family tried to make to us. What do you do? Call their child a liar? That is what has been the hardest to deal with in this whole thing. Caroline and this child were caught doing things they should not have been doing, and the biggest question for both of the families was who taught them? Not us, not them, so they blamed the other child. Crazy.

What gives me comfort is that after several long, long conversations with professionals, they case was closed! Which proves there was no wrong doing on our endor the other parents, or on the parts of the two children. Hallejuah! I just felt such a relief wash over me yesterday afternoon when I got the news!

Now I am torn. I have a lot of anger for this other family, but also some concern. Is it that child who really needs help? Is that child the one who taught Caroline bad things? Are those parents too jaded to even accept the possibility that this child needs help? They completely left out their childs actions when they filed the report. They completely blamed Caroline and another child, totally refusing to believe that their child could be the root cause of this. We were told by professionals that this child was crying out. What does this mean for them? They tried to make us feel inferior by saying that they were going to get their child help because of what mine did, and I was stupid because I thought this was no big deal.

Totally wrong. What they refused to listen to was that we had already made appointments for Caroline to see someone. We talked with professionals about the situation, and they confirmed what we thought, it was nothing to get all worked up about, but could be cause for concern. When we told the other family that, they had the nerve to tell us that whoever we talked to should basically be fired because they were stupid. Are people so stubborn that they refuse to admit they might be wrong? That only they can be right?

Caroline is going to see someone. We hope to minimize any effects this may have on her, as well as hopefully get to the bottom of the whole thing. Poor girl was questioned by a police officer who was acting in a capacity they knew nothing about, without my consent, or my presence, and informing me well after the fact. What is wrong with people? They should tend to their own families and accept responsibility for them instead of worrying about others and making claims against them. I could make the same claims, I could file charges for the questioning of Caroline. But we are NOT going to bust into other peoples lives. All I can do is pray that this family can see that there was wrong in what they did, and that they too get help for their child.

I can say this: If after Caroline has seen her therapist, and they let us know that Caroline was in fact part of the problem, then I will go to the other family and let them know we are sorry for what happened. Until then, I have to believe my child. And I understand that they have to believe theirs. I respect that. What I can't respect is that they have no intention of even entertaining the thought that their child may be the problem. There have been signs that point to this child needing some help working through things. There is nothing wrong or bad about that, but this family must think there is if they won't even admit the possibility. At least I can. Caroline has never been anything other than a happy thriving little girl. She has never had any behavioral problems other than talk, talk, talking, and occasionally being whiny. Her teachers have never had anything other than that to say about her, which leaves me to believe she is a normal, happy, healthy, thriving 6 yr. old little girl. Regardless of the outcome, we have made the decision that we can no longer trust these people with Caroline's well being. She won't be allowed to play with that child anymore, which is really sad since they are good friends, but we have to do what is best for Boog, and for us, this is our choice.

On another note...Caroline had her blood counts done last Monday...280!!!!! Woo Hoo!

Seriously in Shock

Wow...I truly had forgotten how cruel some people could be.

Unfortunately, Caroline's dad and his girlfriend have parted ways. What makes this sad is that Caroline really likes the girl {for this post we will call her GF}. And so did I. At first I was a little concerned because she is quite a bit younger, and that made me a little uneasy. I'd like to think that most of us as parents, try to do the best things for our children. GF & I sat down when the time came for Caroline to meet her, and I told her my concerns about her age, and the things I would like her to respect when it came to her dad and I raising our daughter. I felt really good about everything after we talked.

Over the course of this last 6-8 months, we have welcomed GF into our lives and our home with open arms. That may sound strange, maybe it doesn't, but her dad and GF seemed pretty serious so I wanted to make things easier for all of us by respecting his relationship. Because in the end, that's what best for Caroline. GF has been included in all things Caroline...school, holidays, we had them down for Caroline's b-day, and after the long day of 6 year old pampering, we offered for them to stay in our home. Again, the same situation on Christmas day. Which was fine, we get along, she seemed to respect our parenting roles, what could be better.

During this time, all of us including Caroline, had conversations about their future. They were talking about moving down here this summer to be closer to Caroline, talked about marriage, kids for them, etc. Since then, times have been rough for them, which is how it goes right? You have good times and bad times. But my concern with GF has always been how inexperienced she is in life. She is more than a decade younger than me, and just doesn't see quite how the world works. She still lives at home, and Caroline's dad moved in with them too, so GF has no clue what being a "real" adult, being on your own, is like. She thinks she knows. During the last few weeks when Caroline and Tab were trying to make me have a nervous breakdown, GF repeatedly "broke up" {that just sounds so funny to me} with Caroline's dad. I felt really bad for him, seeing as he was unsure about his daughters health, and what would happen next.

What makes this whole thing worse is that GF did all this, "it's over, and you need to move" while Caroline was there. To me, that was a conversation to be had without her present. And now, she has been there this whole week for spring break, to yet again be told that her dad has to move out. GF assured me the other day, after a crying Caroline said that GF told her they could go ride horses but then left to go to the movies with another boy, that she was thinking about how this would affect Caroline and making sure she didn't do anything to hurt her. Caroline doesn't understand what is going on. And later that night, GF thought that she would be asleep and that it would be okay for her to bring a guy home with her, change clothes, grab a change of clothes and her toothbrush and leave with this guy. Caroline was awake, and saw this. I made a visible comment about not respecting me or Caroline about doing this in front of her. And yes, I was a tad ugly {not with nasty language}, I just said that if she couldn't respect what I asked, then maybe she should introduce her boyfriend to Caroline next time.

I know, I know...I am better than that, I was just so mad that she blatantly ignored my rights as a mother to keep those things out of Caroline's vision, that I lashed out a little. Instead of being the adult she thinks she is, and talking to me about it, this is what I find:

TO:ALICIA_B***h f**k you, you dont even know what your talking about so shut your f***ing mouth- GF has friends that are guys and no that isnt her boyfriend, you should be more concerned about her {Caroline's} dad taking care of her instead of who GF is with or not with. GF doesnt want to f***ing go home because your x-husband is there driving her crazy!{GF asked him to move in with her} ...so before you go believing everything that comes out of his mouth y dont you check yourself and get both sides of the story {I called and asked GF what was going on} and leave GF the f**k alone have you ever thought if steven actually had a stable life and could live on his own then THAT would prevent alot of things you dont agree with{so that makes GF's actions okay because he is living with her}?? hello. yall both should be lucky GF doesnt kick steven out of her house right now..now maybe yall should think about how that would make Caroline feel- because without GF right now he is homeless..{he might be, but Caroline has a loving, moral home with me & Tab, where those immoral things don't take place.}

This was sent to me by GF's best friend, whojust recently had a baby...at 18, I guess she already got the Best Mom Award, and has earned the right to tell me a mom of 6+ years how to be a parent. I guess maybe I have a lot more to learn about being a good parent. Ahhhhh. What it must be like to be so young and act so carefree. I prefer to spend my time making sure my little girl has the best childhood she can.

I would really like your comments on this one. Am I overreacting? Did I over step my bounds? Did I do the right thing and look out for Caroline's best interests? At this point, I just don't know. I prayed for wisdom last night, and comfort in my actions. I also prayed for GF and her friend. I do know that I love that precious, innocent, sweet little girl more than I could ever say in words.

Whiny Wednesday

The title Murry Mayhem stands true yet again. I am just flat out having a bad day. I won't go into all the gory details, but I am going to vent.

November is just not my favorite month to begin with. Then Caroline's birthday being right around Thanksgiving makes it worse. It's just a busy time. And I'm feeling it. A party to plan, Thanksgiving to cook for, and getting ready for Christmas.....Whew! Busy, Busy, Busy!

I have a lot that I haven't posted, and hopefully I'll get to that later! And they won't be whiny posts {promise!}.

PTA or Bust!

Sometimes I can't figure out how I get myself into these things! I WANT to be a part of the PTA at my daughter's school, I WANT to help in any way that I can.

I am now the Proud Committee Chair of The Academic Excellence Committee! WHOA! How did I manage that?

Now before I begin to get really whiney....it really isn't that hard. Just fill out some certificates for awards for every six & nine week report cards, AND get local businesses to donate gift cards! HA!!!!

I might be able to do the cutesy certificates, but get people to donate?!?!? I'm not so sure about that part. But in my defense, I told the PTA president that I would give it my best shot. And I really will.....I think!

Surely I can do this! If not, I am afraid I will end up kicked out of the PTA {I don't really think they'd kick me out....I hope!}

I Just Can't Help Myself

Can we say, "Tuesdays Stink!". At least that's how I feel! So this morning was pretty comical in our humble abode....at least to me!

Caroline was a little slow getting it together this morning, and she went to bed at 8:30, like normal....with no complaints! But she was a bear this morning to get going. Breakfast was ready when I got her up, cartoons were on, and her clothes were laid out. This should have been easy. Then right around 7am her dad calls to chit chat with her, which is great, because normally she won't talk on the phone unless its a friend. The only bad part was that it slowed her down even more.

I kept reminding her to get dressed that the bus would be here in 10 minutes. Nope, she didn't make it. As I tell her for the third time to hurry, she yells that the bus is here and I need to run. What? I'm not running anywhere! I grab the rest of our stuff and head out the door. The bus is gone.

Now for me this is no big deal, I can take her to school, she just likes the bus. You would have thought it was the end of the world through her eyes! She started crying and then told me that it was all my fault because I had to go get a Dr. Pepper! Ha! I just didn't respond to that, and got her in the car and on our way. By the time we got to school...less than 10 minutes later, she was fine...until she remembered that she had to go to the dentist. She hates the dentist! So do I. I sent the blessed grandparents on that mission with her this morning, I'm not going! Am I a bad mommy? I hope that doesn't make me one, I just can't stand to see her cry, and I can't console her when we are at the dentist. I thought maybe my parents would have better luck than me! We'll see what they have to say!


Much Love~
Alicia

If you can't say anything nice......

Ya know, I try to keep that old saying in the forefront of my mind sometimes, but other times, I just don't care! So, let me begin by saying this will be a venting post. Boog went to spend a week with her dad, and had a blast! Now, I am somewhat of an anal mommy, at least about certain things. Examples: There are only a few SELECT people that are allowed to drive with Caroline in the car, I don't like people to take her to LARGE public places like the mall or the zoo, she MUST ALWAYS ride in her booster seat, and ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS wear sunscreen! Let's just say that some people aren't as diligent as I am with these things.

We moms come in all different forms, and some are more crazy than others....I'm not quite sure where I fall, you'll have to decide :) But I am my mom in so many ways! My mom was always ready to deal with any situation, always had a bag in the car with the essentials: wipes, meds, band-aids, napkins, clothes, OFF, sunscreen, towels, you name it, she had it. I follow this same pattern....and its not just that I never clean out my car :)

Okay, to the point right? This is what my precious baby looked like when I picked her up last Sunday afternoon.









Now this may not look that bad to you, but what you can't see, is the tiny little white blisters on her shoulders. She hurt so much the next morning that I had to stay home with her....bless her little heart! So...now everyone understands why I am venting. I keep sunscreen in my car! At ALL times! Now I am not perfect, and yes, she has been sun burned on my watch before, but not like this....EVER! And you may think I am being really mean, but this is not the 1st time she has been sent home like this, or the 2nd, or the 3rd, this is about the 5th time! What goes through some people's head? Now I don't really want to seem like I am bashing her daddy, because we have come a long way in being able to keep an open line of communication and working together, but COME ON! He just doesn't think about the sun.

So for all you moms, please be diligent in putting sunscreen on your kiddos, it can cause so many problems now & in the future. Here's a little statistic for you: Children who have had 7 or more bad sunburns have a 30% greater chance of developing skin cancer in their early 20-30's.

Okay, I'm done!

Much Love~
Alicia

Just another Monday Night...

Sorry....a little delay there for me, but I completely forgot to post this, and I found it comical, at least it will be for those of you who don't live with us!

This past Monday was just another Monday night, or so I thought!

Sunday after church Caroline wanted to play with Avery, so she called, and Avery was on her way to her Gigi's (grandma's) so Amy said that they could play on Monday when they both got home from school. As soon as I get to school to pick Boog up, she starts asking about playing with Avery. So she calls on the way home and gets the voicemail, leaves her message and then proceeds to pout. Next she tries her hardest to convince me to stop on the way home at Avery's (just so everyone knows, she lives next door!) so she can see if they are home.

I tell you this child never gives up! Once she has something in her head, that's it, she is determined to make it happen!

Once I get her home, without stopping at Avery's, and after she has yelled and cried, I give her a snack and tell her to go play. She wants to call again! I said no, which brings on more yelling and tears, which result in a pop on the hiney and some time in the corner for yelling at me.

I start on dinner, and let me tell you this child can eat! She is always starving, and she eats everything. I swear I have the healthiest 5 year old eater around. Back to dinner, so I get it started and the phone rings....it's Avery. Thank God! But oh no, I hear tears, and then I hear her say "but your mommy said we could play today", I think.....great.....what do I do now? Caroline then comes to tell me that she can't play, and that Avery hung up on her. More tears!

I try my best to console her, which just isn't working. And then she starts demanding dinner that she is hungry......again more yelling at me and crying. So we go for round 2 of the pop and corner routine.

Finally dinner is finished, and I am just about to give her her plate when the phone rings again. Avery. She wants to talk to me. Apparently, Caroline was so upset during the 1st call from Avery, that she never heard her say, my mommy says you can come play. She wants to know where Caroline is! UGGGHHHH! So I tell her she can go play for 2 hours. It's 6:30. I want her home in time to bathe her and put her to bed by 9, even though she usually goes to bed at 8:30, I am going to give her an extra 30 minutes since this afternoon has been so traumatic for her.

Oh, and by the way, she now refuses to eat her dinner.

When its time to go pick her up, they start asking if Caroline can spend the night. We tell them no, that I am up earlier than Amy is in the morning, and that since Amy has to go to work too, she won't have time to drop Caroline off at school. Our brilliant 5 years olds then say, well then can we sleep at Alicia's house? Amy & I roll our eyes and say sure why not? We give them the rules: as soon as we get home its bath time, then teeth brushing time, then straight to bed. No playing, no movies, just plain old sleep. They both agree.

Off we go. We get scrubbed, brushed, and dressed for bed, get them down, and take a relaxing breath. Whhheeeewwwww. The door opens. Avery has tears running down her face. So does Caroline. Avery wants to go home and sleep with her mommy. Caroline is devastated. Tab is sitting on the couch laughing.

Now my first thought is that I wish I had something handy to throw at him. I get Avery in the car, and leave Caroline wailing at home with Tab...revenge can be so sweet! I get home, she is still crying, I lay down with her and rub her back. She sobs, and sobs. I finally leave.

I get a large glass of wine and call it a night!

No more Monday's like that please.

Hope you have all enjoyed my dreadful day.

Much love-
Alicia

Morning Frustrations

I know all parents have frustrating mornings with their kids, but I'm telling you, my child makes it her goal to make me want to scream. Each morning its something new. This morning we had several battles. First up, she wants to go potty in my bathroom, not hers. Not that this is necessarily a big deal, but I am in the tub, with the door locked. Otherwise, she would be trying to take a bath with me because she loves bath time. So I tell her no, she needs to use her own bathroom. She screams through the door that if she can't use mine, then I am going to cause her to potty on herself. Are you kidding me? I tell in her the most calm voice that I can muster, that if she even dares to do that, that she will not have ANY privileges for the day, and that she will get a pop, and corner time. This child is so stubborn. After we finally get this situation resolved, and there were no accidents, we get ready.

Now normally the first thing out of her mouth when she gets out of bed is ,"I'm hungry". So she usually eats pronto. She didn't want anything this morning. Odd, but okay. So I give her my usual 5 minutes till we leave warning, and she comes in wanting breakfast! We have been having discussions recently about how she has to ask for things way before we leave, or we won't have time to eat, make a drink, or get whatever comfort item of the day that she may want. So again, I use my calm voice and tell her that she can have apples and bananas in the car. "NO!", she tells me, she wants cereal in a bowl with milk. I try to explain for the 50th time that she has to tell me in plenty of time to eat it instead of 5 minutes before we leave, that we don't have enough time for her to sit down and have a bowl of cereal. She is completely irate. No calming her down. I finally just tell her that if she wants to act like this, then she can just go without breakfast. She changes her tune and says fine, she'll just eat her cereal in a baggie with no milk.

I'm telling you I was so frustrated. We head out the door and she then starts in about wanting to play with a friend after school. I'm already thinking, "crap! I don't want to fight about this too". So I tell her if she is invited, she can play. But of course, I should have read her mind and known that she had already been invited the previous day to play with said friend. Silly me. I told her to have her mommy call me today at work and I could make sure, that made her mad. Somehow, she eventually stopped talking about it, and we continue on to school. When we get there, I can not get her to let go of me. Now if any of you know my child, yes she loves me very much and is mommy's girl, but she doesn't cry when I leave her or beg me to stay. Today she does.

I know my child, and although she can be very pig headed, I know she must not be feeling well. I'll have to wait and see what the day brings to my little ball of fire. She is not herself. Please don't be sick!