Christmas Simplified

It's not a secret that this year has been a trying year for us.  Between family, a hormonal tween, and the ups and downs of the photography biz, it's been well, tough.

As Thanksgiving rolled around I started to think about Christmas. Pulling out the decorations, Christmas cards, presents, gatherings and I just wanted to cry.  In fact, I did.  I thought how in the world I am going to do all that this year?

I'm not.

I realized that I just can't do it.  We don't have the money and I just don't have the desire.  Christmas is about more than all that other stuff, so I'm sort of ditching it this year and focusing on what it's meant to be, the birth of our Savior.

That doesn't mean we won't be with family or go to Christmas parties, it just means that there won't be any big production of buying gifts for everyone, or heck even ourselves.

Instead of the stress I've been under the last few days of  'how am I going to do Christmas this year', I made a decision yesterday that we just weren't doing some huge, crazy expensive Christmas.  We aren't buying for friends or family except for the kids.  If we give to any adults, it'll be handmade and more than likely, so will the kids gifts. 

This year there just isn't any extra money for all of it.  To be honest, hubby and I haven't spent more than $50 on each other for the last 3 years.  We just can't afford it.  And instead of making myself sick over how we're supposed to buy for Caroline and everyone else, we're just not doing it.  And that probably will include Caroline too. 

I love Christmas and I love all the stuff that goes with it.  The decorations, the yummy goodies, the music, the smells, and I truly love giving presents.  But this year, its the bare minimum. 

We'll still bake, on a smaller scale, we'll still decorate.  We'll enjoy each other and focus of the birth of Jesus.  I just can't suffer through another year of trying to make everyone think we have it all.  We don't.  And I'm just so tired of making it look like we do.

I haven't even decorated yet.  We got the tree yesterday.  Instead of a huge noble fir, we got a little 5 foot $18 tree.  And you know what, we love it.  It's just perfect.  It's small and simple, it's just what we wanted.

So to everyone out there trying to figure out how to do it all this year, wondering how you're gonna buy for your kids and everyone else, just do what you can.  Caroline will do without this year and that's ok.  She'll get over it and hopefully have a more memorable Christmas this year.

This is life, real and in your face.  And we're not stressing about it anymore.

Sometimes a Word is Just a Word

The beauty of words is that they have meaning.  Sometimes a word means something different to you than it does to someone else.  Of course each word has its Webster Dictionary meaning, but we all know that sometimes a word is just a word.

I've discovered family is one of those words.  It has many different meanings.  My version is this.

Family is always there. Family supports one another.  Family loves each other.  Family stands together.  Family laughs and cries together.  Family comes together for events, birthdays, celebrations, holidays.  Family is well, family.

Merriam-Webster Version: Family - a group of people who are related to each other.

I've learned, over the last 13 years, that family does not mean the same thing for everyone.  My version apparently doesn't include being related.  I thought it did.  After the last year, with all the ups and downs, it makes me sad to realize that being related isn't a guaranteed part of being a family.

It made me wonder, what is family?  Then I wrote out what family means to me and yep, I never wrote being related.  Why?

Well the answer is simple.  Some of my family is related and some of those I'm related to aren't family at all.  What a heartbreaking discovery, but a life lesson nonetheless.  And one that really has struck me to the core.

You see, whether I like someone or not, if they're related to me, I've always considered them my family.  No matter the distance, no matter how well I know them, I've considered them my family.  Maybe I shouldn't have ever done that, but it's the way I was raised and it's what I did.  I've learned that these family members don't feel the same way, and that's ok.  Now I know, and I'll guard my heart accordingly.

As we head into the Christmas Season, there will be lots of family gatherings.  My only advice to anyone is this: love you're family, related or not.  And if that same love isn't returned, it's their loss.  No point in crying over someone who doesn't care about you in the first place.  But for those who I consider my family, I love you and can't wait to spend the holidays with you.

*there are many of those who are family who aren't included in this collage,

I couldn't include them all*

A Little {or a lot} of Tough Love

Oh mercy.  I always knew there would be tough moments in parenting.  I've had a few.  Those moments where you have to give a little tough love.  Those moments where you are hurt to the core watching your kiddo when they're sick.

Then one day, you realize that it's gonna be a tough love kinda day week and you have to stick to your guns.  You can't back down.  Even when it's their birthday.

Nobody can tell you how to parent your child, you figure it out as you go.  I've always had guidelines and boundaries for things, ideas of the way I wanted to parent.  I knew years ago that when Caroline hit 10, that would be her last big yearly birthday party.  I've always known that when she hit junior high {7th grade} that I wouldn't let her trick or treat anymore, it's for the little ones.  I've always known that I wouldn't allow her to wear visible make-up daily until junior high or get highlights or get acrylic nails.  And those last 2 may not even be allowed then.

But I have always faltered a bit with tough love.  Partly because she's my only child and I feel guilty taking things away or doling out punishments.  Partly because she has divorced parents and that carries it's own kind of guilt.   It's hard on me.  Which is just too darn bad, time for me to get over it.

So tonight when we were going over her homework and checking her grades and I see that she's being lazy in class, I doled out the ultimate punishment.  I took everything away from her, down to her birthday.  We've been battling for over 6 weeks with getting her to complete schoolwork and it was time to take this to an extreme level.  We've tried taking away her phone and ipad.  We've taken away sleepovers.  Nothing has worked.

And believe me, this isn't a case of she can't do the work.  She gets bored with it and doesn't bother to turn it in or sometimes even finish it.  It's so hard as a parent to watch your kid make bad choices.  My fear is that if I don't show her how bad these decisions are now, then she'll continue this behavior and one day it will have horrible ramifications.

I was very blunt and honest with her.  I talked to her with her dad on speaker phone and told her that as far as my house was concerned she had lost all and I do mean all privileges until her grade improved.  No phone, no ipad, no tv, no candy or gum, no junk food, no friends and sadly this means no birthday.

Her birthday is Monday.  I can't very well dish out punishment and say oh, but you can still have your friend sleepover for your birthday and we'll still buy you presents.  She wouldn't learn anything.  She'd think, "oh well, I still got a sleepover and I still got the charm I wanted for my bracelet and my book...".  I even called her grandparents and said that I was sorry but there wouldn't be any cake and ice cream this year.  They agreed and told me they understood completely.  Now I don't know that her dad will apply these same harsh rules at his house, but I hope he does.  Otherwise she'll think she can get what she wants over there even when she's in trouble over here.

I hated having to make the decision to take her birthday away, but she already celebrated it on a cruise 2 weeks ago, she's just losing her present and a friend spending the night.   It's not like she's losing it altogether. 

After all was said and done I sent her off to take her bath.  I could hear her crying.  My momma heart hates that part.  I went in and asked her what suddenly made her cry.  "Not getting my charm", she tells me.  And my heart broke.  The charm she asked for was a charm for her sweet dog Squirt that was killed while we were on our cruise.  I knew how much the charm meant to her, and it broke my heart.

I immediately wanted to take it all back and tell her I would still give her the charm.  But I knew I couldn't.  So I used it as an opportunity to teach her this tough lesson.  I asked her if she learned that her actions had consequences and she sobbed yes.  I asked her if she understood why I had to do this and she sobbed yes.  It was the first time I've ever seen her be truly upset that she was being punished.

I may be wrong and y'all may think I'm handling this completely wrong, but for her, I think this was the only way.  I sadly found something that she was truly hurt to lose.  My only hope is that she respects me for my decision one day.   Because in the end, this was so hard for me to follow through.  I just wanted to gather her in my arms and tell her it was ok, she just needed to do better.  But I knew that wasn't the answer this time.  She needed tough love.

But my oh my, my momma heart still hearts.

Sweet November

Ahhh November. 

A month of many emotions for me.

There's a slew of birthdays.  My dad.  My mom.  My best friend.  My daughter.

And then, there's my dark day.

November 13th.

The day my mom went to be with Jesus.

A day of healing for her.  A day of heartbreak for me.

And then, I'm supposed to be thankful.

___________________________________________

For me November is a time to be happy.  Sad.  Thankful.

And a time to reflect.

It doesn't matter how much faith I have or the fact that I know God had a plan for my mom, just as there's a plan for us all, it will always hurt to my core that my mom isn't here with me.

It will always make me giddy that God chose me to be Caroline's mom.

And it should make me happy that I had her 1 year & 11 days after my mom went to heaven.  To have such a blessing in the midst of such sadness.  Most days it does.  But some Novembers it's just hard.  It's hard because I want to share my unbelievable joy with the one person who isn't here to share it with me.

I'll always know that she's with us, watching and smiling down on us. 

I just wish she were here.

Smiling and laughing with us.

Check Yes or No

I've entered preteen hell. Yep the so-called tween years.  And do you know what comes with being a mom to a tween girl?  Boys.

That's right friends, I said boys.  This was totally not in my plan.  Like ever.  Of course we joke about our kids not dating till their 30.  That's just what parents do.  We tease our kids about their little kinder 'boyfriends/girlfriends' and think its cute and silly.  We say things like, 'oh little sally has a little boyfriend' and then the dads roll their eyes and the moms giggle.  The kids share some dirt at recess and all is okay.

Skip forward a few years.  Our littles are now at the end of their elementary careers and start noticing the opposite gender.  The girls giggle, the boys act all grossed out and the moms, we kind of ignore the whole thing.  Sometimes we just think about it as their little friend and when they ask if they can get a valentine candy for them we oblige.

Now the little notes start coming home, and I have some of the cutest little notes my girl has received.  Some just saying they like her, some saying she's pretty, and then there's the note with cute little boxes. Check yes or no.  Heaven.help.us.all.

When that little gem came home the last week of 4th grade I had a choice.  I could totally deflect this whole thing or I could face it head on.  I chose the latter.  Why Lord, why?

Let me explain.  Caroline has always had a little boyfriend.  They've been best friends since kinder.  The mom and I are good friends and both knew that they called each other BF/GF.  Ehhh, big deal.  Then above note comes home from another little boy, who has also been one of her best little friends since kinder.  She adores this kid because they have so much in common.  He's her buddy.  As she shows me the note, she tells me that she wants to be his GF and that she has to break up with the other little boy.  Do what?  Wait.  I surely didn't just hear this.

My little 10 year old is talking about breaking up with boys.  Excuse me while I pick my jaw up.

I thought about my own childhood for a few minutes and decided that it was time to face this stuff head on whether I was ready or not.  I had a boyfriend the summer after 4th grade and so did my friends.  Obviously it was a different time 26 years ago, so it wasn't such a shocking thing back then.  So how do I handle this now, in an age of technology where they have access to things we never knew about at that age?  How do I shield her from knowing more than she should?  Especially about the whole big world of boys and girls, puberty and the inevitable, dating?

I was honest.  I told her about what God intended, about what is and isn't age appropriate.  I talked to her about feelings, about being honest with people.  I taught her about compassion for those who like someone and it's not a mutual feeling. After all was said and done, she said she understood and that if she was being honest, she really shouldn't be someone's girlfriend if she liked someone else.  Hearing that from your 10 year old evokes 2 emotions: fear and pride.  I'm not ready for her to like boys, yet I'm proud that she understands the need for honesty, to herself and to others.

Lucky for me, I'm good friends with both of these boys mommas.  We can talk about this whole new realm together and navigate a path for these kids that's informed, safe and innocent.  We have the opportunity to teach them what this should be like at their age.   And luckily because they've raised good kids I don't have to go all crazy momma on their boys, they both have always been so sweet to my kid.  Makes a mommas heart happy.

When we live in a time where 5th graders are going to homecoming with dates and mums they've made for each other {this is Texas, mums are a way of life} we have a responsibility to our kids to teach them what's age appropriate.  Now, we didn't do the whole homecoming thing in 5th or 6th grade, but as I watched my FB news feed fill with pictures of her little friends at homecoming I realized that, as parents I really hoped we were all teaching our kids the right things about relationships.

After this week, I realized we aren't.  There are 3 types of parents in this thing.  There's the ones who don't really say a lot to their kids, there's those like me who really try to explain, and there are those who are totally against any form of "dating". As parents, its our choice to parent our littles however we chose.  This is a wonderful thing.  It's also a bit challenging.  Hopefully we can all work together so that we teach these young 'ens how to be happy, productive, compassionate adults one day.

This week my girl broke up with her little BF and was asked back out by her 1st little BF.  Did I really just say that? Yes, yes I did. And it was weird.  We had a long, long talk about the whole thing.  Every thing from why, to the correct way to do this without deeply hurting someone's feelings.  Yes, I said deeply about the love triangle of 11 year olds.  Calm down people, these kids aren't in love, but they've been friends forever and no matter the form of rejection, it hurts.  In the end, she tried her best to write a note explaining the break up.  It wasn't the most eloquent note, but she tried very hard to be sweet and she was honest. 

Of course, I've talked to all mommas of said triangle.  I adore both of these littles and couldn't be happier that I have open communication with their mommas.  Thankfully, all mommas involved are on the same page.  We all know this is something to teach them about.  We don't let them blindly think they have real BF/GF's.  One day, many, many years from now maybe Caroline will date one of these little men.

In the meantime, I'm going to continue to try and teach Caroline how to be a little lady, how to treat people with respect, and pray that it works.

10 Things My Mother Taught Me

1. You Catch More Fly's with Honey than with Vinegar

Seriously.  Truth.  Not that many of us want to catch fly's, unless it's summer in Texas, and they're flying around your outdoor BBQ.  Really though, if we put a sour attitude out no one will want to be around us.  Try smiling at a stranger in the grocery store, you'll be surprised how much just a little gesture like that can do for your mood and those you interact with.

2. Never leave the House without Mascara and Lip gloss

My mom always made me go back in the house and put in mascara if I didn't already have it on.  Now this may seem mean or like my mom put too much emphasis on physical beauty, but that's simply not true.  My mom always thought I was beautiful with no make-up.  Her lesson was more along the lines of freshen up your face so you look bright and happy.  And it's true.  Try it.  I'm not an everyday make-up girl.  But let me tell you, the difference in my face with just a swipe of mascara and a little gloss is amazing.  It certainly doesn't make me beautiful, it does make me feel like I'm put together.  

No, my kid does not actually leave the house like this.

This was a mommy daughter date, totally different.

3.  Family Matters

Always.  Family's are tricky, I know.  We all have some sort of crazy in our families, no family is perfect.  But your family is your building block whether you have a great family life or a horrible family life. Your family matters.  Treat them with love and understanding.  Be there.  One day, they'll all be gone.  Take care with what you say and how you treat them.  And they should do the same although, that's not always the case.  Remember words and actions hurt, and sometimes you can't come back from those hurtful things.  God blessed us with this group of crazies for better or worse, make the most of your family.  They matter.
 

4.  Always Take Care of Your Nails

Next time you're at the grocery store check out, look at your cashier's hands.  Impressed? Grossed out?  My momma always told me that based on someone's fingers and toes, you can tell alot about their hygiene. So far, that's true.  That doesn't mean that you have to have long perfectly polished nails.  What it means is, if you can see a line of funk under someone's nails, what else are they not cleaning? Eeek!  And this goes for toes too...this was taken in line at the grocery store.  Would you want to go to his house for a lunch date?

5.  Know How to Cook

My mom was a fantastic cook.  I can't remember anything not being yummy.  It was important to her that she have a hot meal for us everyday, and not always prepared by her.  We took turns.  We each had a night that we were responsible for dinner.  From a very young age she had my sister and I cooking dinner.  Mom was old school, everything from scratch, so that's how I learned.  No boxes or jars, which can be super time consuming.  What I realized, is that she gave me a little edge on creativity.  I can always through something together without stressing that I don't have what the box says.  Which, don't get me wrong, however you choose to cook is up to you.  Just cook.  Its better than wasting a ton of money eating out all the time.  Even if you don't cook a lot, at least know how to cook a meal every once in a while.

6.  Always write a Thank You Note

 Like Always.  Telling someone thank you is essential.  No, not in a life or death type of way, but in a that really meant a lot to me, thank you, kind of way.  It's important, it lets us know we did something that mattered in your eyes.  I'm not saying for every time your hubby, friends or mom send you flowers a note is required, you'll know when you should take the time to write one.  Like Nike says, Just Do It.

7. Volunteer

Whether its for the PTA, church, or a local charity give a little of your time when it's needed.  Everyone is busy.  Everyone has a million things on their to do list and never enough time.  Find time to give back.  Just like we're all busy, we all need some help every now and then.  Get your children involved, teach them that helping others no matter how small that help is, it's helping when someone is in need.

8.  A Woman Should Always have a Signature Scent

I've talked about this before.  It seems silly to some, a little dated, but trust me on this one.  Think about your grandmother, a teacher, a friends mom.  What reminds you of that person?  Every time I smell L'Air du Temps I think of my sweet momma.  When I smell Chanel No.5 I think of one of her dear friends Miss Sandra.  When I smell eucalyptus I think of my mom's other dear friend Janet.  All 3 smells bring me the best memories of 3 amazing women who I love dearly.  

9.  Wear Clothes that Fit Your Body

I can't stress this enough.  Seriously.  I went through the normal teen girl phase where I thought I was as bis as a whale and I dressed like it.  When I finally put on clothes that were the correct size...wowzers, huge difference in the way I looked and the way I felt about my body.  Having the right fit makes such an impact on self image.  

10.  Love Unconditionally

Even when it's hard.

A Letter to Caroline

Sweet girl.  Goodness, we've had a rough time lately.  You're growing up and finding out that life isn't always barbies and snow cones. 

God gave me the biggest blessing and job I'll ever have the day I became your mommy.  He has entrusted me to raise you, teach you and love you unconditionally.  Yes, that means even when we don't agree on things.  I take my job as your momma very seriously.  I want to raise you to love Jesus.  I want to raise you to be compassionate.  I want to raise you to be respectful.  I want all these and so much more for you.

I need you to know that I am not your friend.  I'm your momma.  I do things based on what I think is best for you.  Not what you think is best.  Get used to this my darling girl, it won't change anytime soon.  This doesn't mean that I can't be your friend, you can always come to me with anything, I promise.  But I'm not going to shirk my momma duties to be cool, so you'll like me.  I hope you'll like me because I am an amazing momma.  Even though there will be times you can't stand me.

Lately we butt heads every.single.day.  And it's hard on both of us.  I promise I understand what you're going through.  I remember 6th grade.  I remember the mean girls, the new friends, chores, pimples, the other girly stuff, homework and yes, boys.  I also know that your little life has been pretty easy up until this point.  And sweetheart, your growing up, you'll gain more responsibility and the more you whine about it, the more you'll get.

I was raised in a time where things were very different.  We weren't all winners, we got spankings.  Not like your generation at all where every one gets a trophy, and the most common punishment is asking what choice you could have made differently.  You will have consequences for your actions.  If you miss blocking a goal in your soccer game, well, then your team might lose.  I may ask you if you made a good choice, but I promise it will be followed by a punishment other than a stern talking to.  This isn't because I'm mean.  It's because I love you.  And in the real world, you're not all winners, and getting in trouble can be a lot worse than a spanking.

You see, what I teach you matters.  If I teach you that pouting till you get your way and you get to keep your precious iphone then, when you grow up and get a job, the first time you pout, your boss will not think it's cute and let your tardy slide.  If I teach you that a task is important, then you'll grow up and have respect for the job that you have and want to do great at that job.  Or at least that's my hope.

I want to teach you about Jesus, so that you know His love for you.  I want you to know that His light will make your light shine stronger and brighter.  That no matter what, He will always be with you, even when things are tough.  And I want you to know that His light shines through you and reaches others. 

I want to teach you to be a lady.  To respect yourself.  I want you to know your important and precious.  That you deserve to be loved and treated like a lady.  That boys are mean sometimes {and girls too} and I want you to know how to deal with those things.

I want you to be respectful.  No more eye rolling.  It makes me crazy.  I want you to value what I say, not count the seconds until I quit talking.   Seeing as your only 11, this might be hard, but no matter what we have to get through all this together.

Now, this whole letter may seem silly to you, but if we have more mornings where I'm screaming, your crying, phones are being thrown out of car windows, and I stop the car and get out walking...neither one of us will ever make it to the goal.  You'll cause me to be drinking in the corner while you Instagram my empty wine bottle. 

So lets work a little harder to be kinder and more patient with each other, ok?

Love,

Your Worn Out Momma

The Summer Blues

I posted a picture on Instagram today, it wasn't some gorgeous picture of our perfect day, but rather a picture of an imperfect moment.  A picture of a lesson learned.

This time of year {a week into summer} my feeds on Facebook, Twitter, IG and blogs are filled with complaints from parents about their restless and bored children.  And every year it makes my blood boil.  I understand where these parents are coming from, don't get me wrong, I really do.  For me, the anger behind it comes from a very deep, personal place.  

I wish I had 3 kids to make me crazy in the summer.

I have one.

We tried, we prayed and we looked at all of our options.  God answered back with, "Caroline's enough".  And we said, "ok".

Seeing people talk about their 2-4 kids and the gripes of when does school start, it just really makes my heart sad.  Add to that, I have to share my daughter all year long with her dad, so my summers with her are cut in half.  Yes, there are so many of us who struggle with co-parenting issues and sharing are precious babes year round, but when you don't have to do that, you don't understand the pain that causes.  I always hear people say, "gosh, I wish I had a week without my kids", and I'm sure if I never had to alternate my time with her I would feel the same way.  Believe me when I say, I understand needing a break, or how a weekend away would be nice.  But...you won't hear me saying those things.

I feel the strain of summer just like all the other parents of the world.  What do we do with our kids for 2-3 months?  How do I entertain them?  The constant making snacks and meals, helping get things from the closet, playing games, going on outings.  I get it.

Some of us have outside jobs, some of us work from home, and some of us are full time mommies.  The titles may be different, but we all feel the summer blues.  For me, working at home is almost harder then when I worked in an office.  Balancing work and focusing on my limited time with Caroline is hard, and sometimes like this week, I lose focus of how lucky I am to get this time with her.  I let the need to edit a session override a special moment with her.

Tuesday was one of those days where I needed to spend the day editing, but Caroline had been dying to paint my nails.  So I worked for awhile and told her she could do my nails that evening.  When the time rolled around, I was still knee deep in a wedding and I finally caved to Caroline's demands.  The only problem was, I had the wrong mindset.  I just wanted to get back to what I was working on, didn't want to enjoy that my 11 year old daughter wanted to do something nice for me.  She takes after me and loves to have pretty nails, she'd been scouring the web for exactly what she wanted my nails to look like.  She gets everything out and tells me she wanted to do polka dots.  She did a practice run on a paper plate and got upset because it wasn't working the way the video she watched showed it would work.  Of course I was getting impatient.  She immediately sensed it, got upset and wanted to just give up.  How do I respond to that?  Yep, I get upset that she's throwing in the towel, try to show her how to do it, get more frustrated and end up being short with her.

I took a deep breath and encouraged her to finish, telling her that she can do it even if it doesn't look the same as the video or the same as my attempt.  When she was all done, she was still a little sad at how they turned out, and honestly, I was feeling the same.  I like perfect nails.  It wasn't until this morning when I sat and looked at them, that I thought about how special it was that she wanted to paint my nails and she wanted them to be perfect.

They were perfect.  It just took me longer than it should have to see it.

When your sitting there, having the summer blues, listening to your kids fight and scream, "I'm bored", stop for a minute and refocus.  Think about the blessings God has given you, think about all the imperfect moments, and how those moments are perfect in the most special ways.

Mayhem Menagerie

No, I don't really hold wild animals captive.  But if I thought I could, I probably would.  No, really, I might.  It's a long standing joke in our house that I'll bring home every animal I can get my hands on, and I seem to have passed that trait on to Caroline.  We're both constantly asking hubby, 'please can we bring him/her home', at least once a week.

We just can't help ourselves.

We've had tons of fur babies over the years {or scaly babies} and we always want more, it doesn't help that we have some land either, that just means we have more room for all of them.  Right now, we only have 5 fur balls.

Last year we had 3 Guineas, which if your not familiar, their like chickens.  We loved them, they were so much fun to watch!

Sadly, I should have chosen different names for them.  BBQ, Ranch & Honey Mustard were a cute thought, but turns out Heidi really likes BBQ and Ranch.  She eventually decided that Honey Mustard was pretty good too. 

So now, we're trying to convince the hubby that we need a goat, chickens, a pig and a mini cow.  Yes, it sounds crazy, but look how cute they all are!

I'm not holding my breath on getting any new pets anytime soon, but it never hurts to beg! 

Living in the country presents some difficulties with having animals sometimes.  Yes, I know, it's the country it should be so easy to have animals, its not like living in the city.  What I never thought about when I first moved to the country was all the obstacles there are out here.  Like snakes.  It's bad enough if you have them, but if they bite a small dog or a cat, it doesn't always turn out so well.  Other Dogs.  Yep.  Most homes in the country don't have a huge chain link fence around there 40 acres.  We have pipe fences, split rail fences, barb wire fences, but I can't tell you a single person who has a chain link fence.  When a neighbor dog comes onto your land, you have very little control.  And believe me when I say that plenty of country folk shoot animals when they come onto their land.  Luckily for us, its not often that we have visitors, so we've never had to talk to a neighbor about their intruding animals.  But we have had several of our dogs shot.  It's heartbreaking.  Coyotes.  For Real.  They don't come over for a friendly "hi" either, they come to search out food.  If it's been a dry year, they come closer to homes looking for food. 

And then you have big livestock, cows, horses, donkeys.  They kick.  Heidi, our Australian Shepherd is a herding dog, and herd she does!  She loves to herd our neighbors cattle, she's been known to put a few donkeys in place too.  She's sulked back to the house many times a little sore.

As much as we love animals, there's a lot to consider first.  The vet bills can get outrageous and its irresponsible to have too many pets if you can't financially handle them.  I still have tons of research to do about the new breeds we want, so that we can make sure that we'll be able to take care of them financially as well as loving them.  I don't want to be THAT family that turns them over to a rescue because I was unprepared.  It's one thing to have an animal with issues that needs to be re-homed than to do it because you didn't know what you were getting into.

What animals do you have?  Or if you could have any pet you wanted, what would it be?  I love seeing/hearing about everyone's fur babies {but not snakes, I can't handle the snakes}!

Fun{ky} Filled Friday's

Summer brings new routines, lazy days, long nights and lots of time to create.  It brings different make-up routines and different summer scents.  Different hair.

In yesterday's post, I talked about how we add fun colors to our hair as soon as schools out for the summer.  Yes, that makes me the coolest mom around.  Or at least my kid and her friends think I am.  Or maybe that's just what they tell me.

Source

We found this at Sally's Beauty if you have one near you.  Of course we've tried several other brands through the years, but hands down cost wise this one is the best.  Also, the colors are pretty vibrant, and so far wash and wear well.

I don't know about you, but in the summer heat, I hate the feel of make-up.  I like to use a good moisturizer, and light make-up.  It just feels better that way.  Right now, I'm using a new day/night cream that I really love.  It feels amazing, smells great and soaks in really quick, no heavy feeling at all.

I didn't include a source for this one, because really you can get it just about anywhere.

When I actually deem it necessary to put on make-up, I use this tinted moisturizer by Stila.  Best thing I've ever purchased beauty wise.

Source

Now onto the DIY fun!  I love, love to create.  Call it DYI'ing, crafting, painting, creating, doesn't matter, I'm in.  We've had my parents dining room furniture in storage for quite awhile.  The plan was to eventually chalk paint it and then move it in the house.  I finally got a chance to start on it!

It took me a long time because I have to research the best tips, products etc.  Now I know there are a million Annie Sloan Chalk Paint fans out there, and I was too, but I also really love supporting small businesses.  I started researching and had just about decided I was gonna invest the money in Annie Sloan products until I stumbled on several horrible articles.  Everything from safety sheets on her products to pending lawsuits. Wowzers.  I then decided to look into a few more small businesses that make chalk, mineral, clay {whatever you want to call it} paints.  In the end, I decided there was too much nonsense in that world for me and I was just making my own.  Turns out, I'm pretty good at it.  I love the texture, the way it goes on, the coverage, and the finish was that perfect finish everyone raves about.

Here's my recipe:

1 quart paint {any brand color you like}
6-7 tablespoons of Plaster of Paris {most recipes I found called for less}
1-2 cups Water

Now on the water, this is really up to you.  Almost every recipe I found barely called for any, mostly about 2-3 tablespoons.  I found that this made the paint too thick, so I kept adding until I was happy with the consistency.  Basically, I added about 5 tablespoons, then poured the whole thing into a large mason jar, and then kept adding water.  If you use too much water, it's ok leave the top off and let it sit for a while, it'll thicken up.  And if you get it too thick, just add water.  Easy peasy.

I still have the buffet and the china cabinet to do, so it'll be several weeks before I get to post the finished results!

Ok, that's all I've got for today!  I'll leave you with the cutest pics of my girl.  We snuck away for a burger and shake.  It was good for my soul.

First Week of Summer

School's out and the first week of summer is in the books!  We had a pretty low key start to summer, no big trips, no big plans.  Just a little down time, which was nice with the end of school rush.  We just needed a few lazy mornings, a few days filled with being outside.  Although, I'm pretty much done with being outside for awhile, the mosquitoes and chiggers have feasted on me all week long.  Have I ever mentioned that I don't like summertime?  I'll take the winter.

Back to our week.

I do enjoy one perk of summer though, I use summer as my pass to indulge in my love for colored hair.  For the last 3 summers, as soon as school is out, the hot pink dye comes out.  Caroline chooses turquoise and green, but I'm a pink girl.  We literally count down the days until we can pull out our dyes and have some fun.

My Niece graduated from High School on Saturday and we hosted a Graduation Party for her that evening.  We planned for everything to be outside, crazy I know since this is Texas and all, but we Texans have enjoyed a rather cool summer.  For Texas.  It ended up that it was pretty humid that day and we really needed to be inside, but of course our A/C decided to quit and it was cooler outside anyway.  Gotta love Texas.  See why I'm not a fan of summer?

We stayed home most of the week, Caroline and my youngest niece played outside all day and night.  Mostly because I said they had to, I wasn't putting up with sitting in front of the tv all day, they needed to get outside and play.  And they did.  With the water hose, on the trampoline, laid in the hammock reading.  At night they built cup towers and then knocked them down, giggling the whole time.  I did laundry, and more laundry, and yep, more laundry.

Wednesday we spent some time with my daddy.  We had lunch, shopped then finished up with some good old dipped cones from DQ, that's Dairy Queen if you're not from Texas.  The best ice cream cones on the planet.  It was lots of fun watching my 73 year old daddy try to eat his triple cone before it melted all over the place!  It makes my heart happy to see Caroline and her grandpa together, add in some giggles and my cup runneth over.

Thursday, well, it was like Christmas.  The heavens parted and the A/C guy came and fixed a few wires and made my whole world happy again.  I literally stood in front of the vents and smiled as the cold air poured out.  Hey, when you have to endure Texas summers, there's not much better than cold A/C and a glass of sweet tea or a cold Dr Pepper.

Stop back by Friday for some Fun{ky} finds and DIY inspiration!

Summer Blogging

We all know that blogging takes time.  And sometimes we just don't have that time.  I'm determined to be better about that.  I had this plan in my head for a summer series, and I think I'll still do one, but I'm taking June to join a sweet blog friend in a challenge to get back into blogging and I'm going to attempt to blog 3 times a week.  Stop laughing.  I know, I know.  I haven't blogged 3 times a week in 3 years {or more}.

Kendra over at Domestic Princess in Training has put out a challenge to her friends to get back to blogging.  Her challenge reminded me of everything I love about blogging.  I met her several years ago at a blogger get together and just loved her!  I love keeping up with her family's journey!  You should stop by and say hi :)

Stop by my little old blog during June to see what's going on in my crazy world.  I have several things to blog about.  Favorite products, DIY projects, family, photography, and well the mayhem that is our life.

Since we all love pictures {that's half the fun of reading blogs right?} I'll leave you with this adorable couple I had the privilege of capturing on their special day.  This was literally a last minute booking since their original photographer cancelled a month before the wedding!  They were so perfect for each other and I enjoyed every minute of shooting the big day!  Thank you Justin & Lindsey for having me capture all these special moments!

Trash TV

Let's be honest y'all, I'll start.  I'm a sucker for trashy TV shows.  Ok, maybe not exactly trashy, but just plain bad reality shows.  Now don't get me wrong, I do have a line that can't be crossed.  Can we say Honey Boo Boo Child?

Sometimes, when I pull up my DVR list, I just giggle at all the mindless nonsense that resides there.

I don't know about you, but the whole Real Housewives Franchise has me hooked.  It started with the OC.  I was just beyond shocked at the way these women lived.  It was like a whole new world to this Texas girl.  I mean, I'm not a stranger to people with lots of money, this is Texas after all and I was raised in the Big D.  It was the whole lifestyle, the parties, the clothes, the tans, the plastic surgery. Whew.  It was a lot of crazy.

Then I got suckered into New Jersey.  And sadly, I like their spunk.  They have passion.  But obviously, they have honesty issues.  Those women are a hot.mess.

Atlanta was a little too loud for me, so I just skipped that one, only to get drawn in by my friend.  Dang you Misty!  Now, they just crack me up.  But if their seasons continue down the same paths they have for the last 2, they may lose me again.

Then we move on to Beverly Hills.  And if I thought the OC was over the top, Beverly Hills was just plain jaw dropping.  Although, I love me some Lisa Vanderpump.

 
Then there's the hustle & bustle of New York.  This group is a whole 'nother kind of crazy. 

We wrap-up with the feisty Miami bunch.  I only thought I talked fast and with a heavy accent.

Now don't get me wrong, there are plenty of these ladies that are business women and mother's who love their kiddos.  I just can't imagine all the drama between each group of ladies.  Maybe because my life is full of running a family and business, PTA and soccer, they just flat out puzzle me.  I don't know where I'd fit in the time to live that kind of lifestyle.  But hey, if some producer wants to come film me chasing Caroline, editing pictures, cooking dinner and watching my laundry pile grow, bring.it.on.