Oh the Tears and Stuff

Since Caroline has been sick for going on a week now, she has been super-duper whiny, with a capital W! I have no idea where she gets that from either {ummm, really, I don't}! So, bless her heart, she comes by it honestly, and maybe that's why it doesn't drive me totally nuts. Notice, I said totally? She does tend to get a little over the top at times. Last night was one of those times. I had a sneaking suspicion when I picked her up that on the 12 minute care ride home she fell asleep, that it was going to be a long night. Boy-o-boy was it!

She whined, cried, and pleaded all night long, about everything. Please don't make me clean up my room, please make dinner, I don't wanna take a bath...and finally it was I want a movie to go to sleep. When that didn't work, she said I was mean! Ha! When I told her that was part of my job, she changed tactics! It was mommie, can you please lay down with me for a little while, mommie, I love you!!! So funny...I had to leave her room so I didn't laugh in front of her!

And the worst part is that I really want to cave, just scoop her up and give her anything her little heart desires...but I can't. What good would that do? None! It would create a monster in another 7-10 years, oh how I dread the teens.

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On another note, she and I are re-doing her room. This has been a long time coming, but she never could make up her mind about anything she wanted. She finally decided, we get started and now after we have one painted wall, she thinks she wants to change it! Nope, not gonna happen Boog! What's done is done! And while painting, I made the mistake of telling her it was okay if I got a little on the carpet because we're getting rid of it and doing a painted floor...what do you think I saw next? Yep, she was smearing paint all over the newspaper onto the carpet for fun! Good grief girl!

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Last Monday {or maybe Tuesday?} Tab was moving some hay in the pasture and Caroline wanted to go say hi. She just had to jump out and go ride around with Tab for a little while and move hay! So what did I do...took pictures of course!






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I think I mentioned that Caroline and I made a canvas for Ryan's parents, and we took it to them on the day of his services. She wanted to make sure I put it on here so everyone could see it!

Encouragement

I could go on and on about encouragement. I love this topic because this is something vital to everyone. I also love that we are doing it in this forum {blogville} because most of us blog for memories and whether we realize it or not, encouragement.

Each blog we read has something that draws us to it: parenting, loss, friendships, faith, humor... you name it and there is a blog about it.

We read for entertainment sure, but stop and really think about some of the blogs you visit. I can promise you that you get encouragement from most of them if not all of them. It may not be that you're even looking for encouragement, but that you stumbled upon it. We all struggle in our own ways, and let's just be blatantly honest here...we like to know others struggle too and how they get through it. That in a nutshell is encouragement. Seeing someone else make it through struggles that we have and knowing you'll be okay, you've just gotten some of the encouragement you need to keep your head held high. Now what form it comes in is a whole other ballgame.



As several of you know, we've had a rough year! Not anything gut wrenching, but emotionally its been a lot...physically its been a roller coaster! I've certainly seeked out {that just doesn't sound grammatically correct :)}encouragement this year! I searched for people who have dealt with children being diagnosed with ITP, a rare blood disease that Caroline was diagnosed with in late February. And, to be brutally honest, I was having quite the pity party for myself a month ago today while I laid in the hospital not being able to be with my family. I felt hopeless for some reason, a huge sadness just washed over me and I felt helpless. I jumped on here and surfed through my wonderful blog therapy, read some scripture, and I started to get to where I needed to be. In that 2 week period where I did nothing but cry, I found one of the most encouraging quotes I had ever heard:

"Let your unfailing love surround us Lord, for our hope is in you alone."
Psalm 33:22

I changed my blog that day so that it would be one of the first things you saw when you stopped by.

I hope that somehow in my little way, that I can be an encouragement to you. I am imperfect. I make mistakes {sometimes huge ones!}. I fail sometimes. I am a child of Christ, with all my faults and follies. And I love my life, even with the bumps in the road.

***If you need some other encouraging stops, check out my sidebar...these blogs rock! And if your on my side bar...thanks for being you and encouraging me!***

Up and then Down

We started the week going to say goodbye to Caroline's sweet friend Ryan. She was unbelievable. I was afraid of how she might feel once we got there, and what questions she might have. She was just like a little adult. She was very sad, but she simply told me that she wasn't going to cry because he was with Jesus, and he wasn't sick anymore, and he was playing with Princess for her {Princess was Caroline's dog that died}. Can I just say WOW! Ryan's family is so sweet, and they loved on her and were so glad that we came. We when got there, a table was set up with pictures of Ryan, and in the middle of them all was a picture of the 2 of them...let's just say she was super excited to see that picture. Before we left his mom gave me a gift for Caroline that Ryan wanted her to have, and she told me to hang on to it until she turns 18, then she can have it. How sweet! Of course I had to peek, and it's a beautiful ring that I know Caroline will treasure. Then Caroline went to spend the night with one of her friends, and had a blast. I figured it would be a good way for her to end a sad day, although I think the whole day was far harder on me than it was on her!


I tried to take her school clothes shopping on Wednesday, and let me tell you...if that girl gets anymore sass in her, I will lose my mind! The teenage years sre going to be sooo fun for sure! She literally walked around the stores like a little diva, a side I haven't really seen before, or not to this extent! We ended up leaving one store and not getting anything because she was demanding that I buy "this, and this mommy"! Ha! I don't think so little girl!



Then on Thursday she woke up with a fever and of course that makes me feel so bad for her. Especially because of her ITP, and the fear that her counts will drop. Poor little girl! We couldn't get into the doctor so I figured I would just drug her {give her the appropriate amount of Tylenol}, and hope for the best. Even with the Tylenol, her fever never would break and she woke up again this morning with the same 101.9 fever. Ughhhh...I hate this for her. So now we are sitting here waiting until the doctor's office opens so we can get her in today. But on another note, we are dog-sitting for my brother and his family while they head off on vacation for a week.
Velma is a sweetie, and yes , Caroline's cousin Blake named her Velma because he loves Scooby Doo!


This is Caroline and Velma a few years ago...how stinking cute!

This week has been full of ups and downs...oh wait, that's normal!
Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Just one Favorite?

I can't choose just one! You'll have to deal with getting several of my favorite pictures of Caroline! I love certain shots for certain reasons, I would never be able to choose!






These 2 just go together!


My Silly Girl

My Carefree Girl

My Morning Girl


Her first goal, she was so proud of herself


This is her ughhhh face

My Sleepy Girl

Please Pray

I am writing this with a broken heart. I'm not even sure what to say. Many of you have prayed for Caroline's friend Ryan, and today I have to tell her that he went to be with his sweet Jesus yesterday.

Please be in prayer for this family. Many of us have never known the loss of a child, many have. I can't imagine how people can make it through this experience without the love of Christ. Ryan's family has that, and I know it will be a comfort to them in the coming days. They turned it over to Him, and knew that it rested in His hands.

Please pray for me to have the strength and the words to explain to Caroline about her precious friend. I never imagined having this conversation with her.

"Lord, please lay your healing hands on this family to heal their heartache for the loss of Ryan. We know that you are with them Lord, and that you will never forsake them. Please give them peace and comfort and hold them in your loving arms."

When I get the chance, I will post the link to his caring bridge page so that you can shower this family with love.